1776 – American Revolutionary War: The British are defeated in the Battle of Trenton. This was the result of that “Washington Crossing the Delaware” thing. It wasn’t a photo op, it was a BATTLE, and at the end, the Americans lost 2 dead (froze to death on the march there) and five wounded. The Brits and their Hessian mercenary allies lost 22 killed, 83 wounded and 896 captured. In this one battle, the Americans went from almost down and out to “Hey, we just might pull this off.”

1790 – Louis XVI of France gives his public assent to Civil Constitution of the Clergy during the French Revolution. He’s trying to compromise with groups that have already decided he should be dead.

1799 – Four thousand people attend George Washington‘s funeral where Henry Lee III declares him as “first in war, first in peace and first in the hearts of his countrymen.”

1846 – Trapped in snow in the Sierra Nevadas and without food, members of the Donner Party resort to cannibalism. Recipes to follow…

1865 – James H. Mason of Massachusetts patents first US coffee percolator. It’s a horrible way to make good coffee, but a good way to make poor coffee.

1928 – Johnny Weissmuller announces his retirement from amateur swimming, goes on to be a particularly memorable movie star, especially as Tarzan. I and my contemporaries in the local neighborhood spent many a Saturday afternoon watching those movies.

1933 – The Nissan Motor Company is organized in Tokyo, Japan.

1936 – Israel Philharmonic Orchestra forms even though there is no Israel except in the hearts of the Jews. Those silly Jews. They’re isolated and persecuted, and yet there’s still enough spirit for an orchestra.

1944 – World War II: U.S. troops repulse German forces at Bastogne with Patton’s Third Army showing up after a brilliant turning move. General McAuliffe’s reply of “Nuts” to the German commander’s offer to accept his surrender is a fine example of making sure that when your mouth writes a check, your butt can cash it. The 101st Airborne and General McAuliffe wrote the check and Patton’s Third Army cashed it.

1966 – The first Kwanzaa is celebrated by Maulana Karenga, the chair of Black Studies (A sure indication of clarity of thought) at California State University, Long Beach. Aksed where the idea came from, Karenga replied “PIOMA” which he thought was Swahili, but it actually engineer-speak for “pulled it outta my a**”.

1979 – Opening night of the Concerts for the People of Kampuchea at the Hammersmith Odeon; a benefit concert for the citizens of Cambodia who were victims of dictator Pol Pot. Nobody mentions that those were victims of John Lennon’s “Give Peace a Chance.” and other such pacifist tripe. Self-important hippy M*****f*****s. The blood of millions is on their heads.

1982 – Time’s Man of the Year is for the first time a non-human, the personal computer. I remember computers in 1982. Baby steps.

1991 – The Supreme Soviet of the Soviet Union meets and formally dissolves the USSR. Just like that… I spent years thinking I’d be fighting these bas*ards in the Fulda Gap.

1996 – The United Nations Convention to Combat Desertification goes into force. There IS NO END to the stupidity that the UN will put out. This one is right up there with King Canute’s commanding the tides to stop coming in.

2004 – A 9.0 magnitude earthquake creates a tsunami causing devastation in Sri Lanka, India, Indonesia, Thailand, Malaysia, the Maldives and many other areas around the rim of the Indian Ocean, killing 230,000 people.

2006 – An oil pipeline in Lagos, Nigeria explodes, killing at least 260. Didn’t ‘explode’. Thieves punctured it to steal the oil. The spill ignited.