1287 – St. Lucia’s flood: The Zuider Zee sea wall in the Netherlands collapses, killing over 50,000 people. FEMA slow to respond. Bush widely blamed.

1702 (according to the old calendar; January 30, 1703 by the new calendar) – The Forty-seven Ronin, under the command of Oishi Kuranosuke, avenge the death of their master. The is the Japanese equivalent to the Knights of the Round Table/King Arthur: An important post in the national psyche. It’s also the backstory of the movie “The Magnificent Seven“.

1812 – The French invasion of Russia comes to an end as the remnants of the Grande Armée are expelled from Russia. A hundred and thirty years later, the Russians are handing another dictator a similar lesson.

1903 – The Wright Brothers make their first attempt to fly with the Wright Flyer at Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. The Flyer was a really crappy airplane. But it WAS an airplane…

1911 – Norwegian Roald Amundsen’s team, comprising himself, Olav Bjaaland, Helmer Hanssen, Sverre Hassel, and Oscar Wisting, becomes the first to reach the South Pole.

1946 – The UN General Assembly votes to establish its headquarters in New York City. Because EVERY Third-World despot wants to come to America on somebody else’s dime…

1947 – The National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing (NASCAR) is founded in Daytona Beach, Florida and they actually used “stock” cars. Today’s NASCAR ride has about as much in common with something off the showroom floor as a Siberian tiger has with my cat Miss Kitty.

1961 – Jimmy Dean’s “Big Bad John” is the first country song to get a gold record. From back when country music was about talent instead of production and promotion.

1969 – Jackson Five made their first appearance on “Ed Sullivan Show”. What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other can hold your groceries…

1972 – Apollo program: Eugene Cernan is the last person to walk on the moon, after he and Harrison Schmitt complete the third and final Extra-vehicular activity (EVA) of the Apollo 17 mission. This is the last manned mission to the moon so far… Building playgrounds in inner cities gets more votes that silly crap like science…

2003 – President George W. Bush announces the capture of Saddam Hussein. Dimmocrats sh*t their collective pants. If THIS elitist dictator who dispensed political power to friends and cronies can be brought to jail, then… Oops.. Blagojevich…